Interstellar Adventures

July 26, 2005

Romance 101

Filed under: Uncategorized — by InterstellarLass @ 10:33 am

OK, for all you swooning ladies…

Everyone says they want romance in a relationship. Mention the word, and most guys start to get that nervous tic in their eye and panic seems to set in. When someone asks what romance is, I think some people see candlelight, roses, that little black dress, white tablecloth, and waiters in fancy dress. Coming from a background where the most romantic thing my ex ever did for me was give me my first anniversary gift two days early because he couldn’t remember the exact day, but also didn’t want to be late…well, let’s just say the past couple of weeks have been a sort of ‘out of body’ experience.

Culfy commented yesterday (warning: he’s on a bit of a rant today on his blog) that after my description of my date this weekend, his Subway sandwiches didn’t measure up. But I don’t think that’s true. I don’t think romance is based on the scale of what’s in the hamper, I think it’s in the presentation and the intent. And I don’t think it’s always something that has to be overwhelming. I think romance can be found anywhere in ways big and small. Take-away Chinese on the living room floor can be just as romantic as a surprise picnic under the stars. Finding a song on the internet and burning a CD because the other person mentioned they had heard it on the radio but couldn’t find it in the store or online is romantic. Paying a simple compliment out of the blue is romantic. A look, a smile, a wink, a touch can be romantic, because it’s not the action, it’s the sentiment.

Romance isn’t measurable. There’s no blueprint for it. It’s unique to the individual, both the giver and the recipient.

So, I’ve shared what I think romance is and how I’ve been fortunate to experience it lately. How about you, dear readers? What is romance to you? Do you have a memorable romantic moment you’d be willing to share with us?


  1. I think it’s romantic when Brian sends me emails with a single sentence telling me I’m his favorite girl and little things like that. I also like that he tries to make days, like my birthday special by making dinner and taking me out and baking me a cake. Your right, little gestures have a huge effect.

    Comment by Jolynn — July 26, 2005 @ 12:21 pm |Reply

  2. I think I am pretty easy when it comes to romance – I am totally not delusional. To me, its romantic that Hub kills bugs for me, that he lets me have the potato skins with the most cheese on them, and that he tells me I am sexy first thing in the morning. I am a simple girl I suppose.

    Comment by TrueJerseyGirl — July 26, 2005 @ 1:37 pm |Reply

  3. Well, I used to hate Chinese food (still not crazy about it), but my girlfriend at the time loved it, so on our anniversary one time, I took her to a Chinese Restaurant. I think I even blindfolded her so she would be surprised when we got there. Nothing big.

    I have also experienced constant nagging of “Why can’t you be more romantic?” That did not make me want to be more romantic at all. It had the exact opposite effect.

    I think basically, it just takes some effort and thoughtfulness. And listening helps, too.

    Comment by Bone — July 26, 2005 @ 2:08 pm |Reply

  4. That’s so funny that I blogged about romanace too. 🙂 It’s the rock that my hubby gave me for our anniversary last year.

    Y’all can go read it on my blog if you are interested …. but he gave me a rock.

    Comment by Indigo — July 26, 2005 @ 4:25 pm |Reply

  5. I saw your comment at BluegrassMama’s–one of my favorite along with Poopie. So I thought I’d stop by. Oh, I used to live in N. Dallas at Preston Rd and Frankfort. Spent LOTS of time in Plano.

    Comment by Paul — July 26, 2005 @ 6:22 pm |Reply

  6. we’ve been married 23 years. I still find it romantic, that whenever we’re driving somewhere together, my hub reaches over and takes my hand in his.
    you’re right, it’s the little things that count. 🙂

    Comment by Laura — July 26, 2005 @ 8:19 pm |Reply

  7. Damn girl, I haven’t been gone that long have I? I have lots to catch up on with all this romance talk. It’s quite cute though and I am happy for ya. My husband and I have a very good relationship filled with subtle romance…it’s not candy and flowers…it’s holding your head while you throw up, putting on an interested face when touring your childhood neighborhood or PROMISING YOU that you won’t crash and keeping your mind off it all while 30,000 feet up in a speeding steel tube. Which reminds me, I should be home in a few days! Check back with ya then! 🙂

    Comment by Twist of Kate — July 27, 2005 @ 1:32 am |Reply

  8. I’ve got a romantic cavy, the little things like he smiles even when I don’t get his jokes or I can’t remember things, his face waves ..and of course everything else which i’m too shy to blog about 😉

    Comment by Goldiemowling — July 27, 2005 @ 3:11 am |Reply

  9. I’ve been thinking and thinking about this. Now reading all yours, I’m ashamed that I was going to actually say there never was anything romantic worth writing about. But, you all are right…it’s the “you look pretty” or taking you somewhere you know they’d prefer not to go. I am humbled.

    Comment by Carnealian — July 27, 2005 @ 6:18 am |Reply

  10. My idea of true romance, and in fact my idea of true love, is when after sex the girl I’m with will go make me a sandwich. Or at the least not give me crap if I go make one myself.

    Comment by Jacob — July 27, 2005 @ 10:41 am |Reply

  11. Well, that’s just sweet jacob. I’m glad you got the gist of what I was trying to say. Nothing says love like a post-coital sandwich…would you like that on white, wheat or rye? mustard or mayo? pickle with that?

    Comment by InterstellarLass — July 27, 2005 @ 11:30 am |Reply

  12. I think often the idea of romance evolves after time in a relationship too. At the beginning it is often the candle light dinners, picnics and other things that are romantic because they allow time together to get to know one another. When the relationship deepens it can be just the simple things such as an unexpected smile, a quick back rub or some other gesture that let’s the other person know your thinking of them. That does not mean you should not go to dinner or have a picnic once in awhile, but often things like work and kids get in the way so you might have to make up for it maybe not in the quality of the romatic gesture but in the quantity. But then ya forget about the anniversary date and years of small gestures go out the window!

    Comment by Kev — July 27, 2005 @ 12:32 pm |Reply

  13. Romance is whatever touches your heart. My husband likes to leave me creative notes with household objects (I’ve written about this) or writes me a poem or a sweet email. Every once in a while he’ll write me a list of all the things he loves about me. It always makes me cry.

    Comment by MommaK — July 27, 2005 @ 2:18 pm |Reply

  14. I agree that it’s the little things, especially in a long-term relationship. The main thing is that they be done with sincerity and not just going through the motions.

    My husband can just say something like, “that shirt looks good on you”, or give a quick back rub. He’s never made me a post coital sandwich, though!

    Comment by AbbyNormal — July 27, 2005 @ 3:00 pm |Reply

  15. I really hope everyone understood I was being sarcastic about the sandwich…oy!

    Comment by InterstellarLass — July 27, 2005 @ 3:18 pm |Reply

  16. Hey, he could be like George on “Seinfeld” who finds a girl who lets him eat the sandwhich DURING sex.

    Comment by annie — July 27, 2005 @ 6:26 pm |Reply

  17. Wasn’t that the same girl who licked the stamps and died?

    Comment by Anonymous — July 27, 2005 @ 7:45 pm |Reply

  18. Forget romance. Some consistancy would be nice.

    Comment by Queen of Ass — July 27, 2005 @ 9:08 pm |Reply

  19. or are you thinking of a sandwich of a different kind… ????? 😉

    sorry i’ll get my coat this time 😉

    PS: Aren’t chocolate and strawberries more for bedtime??? 😉

    Comment by Goldiemowling — July 28, 2005 @ 2:53 am |Reply

  20. Remember it’s not the size of the hamper it’s what you do with it, that counts……. naughty goldie xx

    Comment by Goldiemowling — July 28, 2005 @ 2:55 am |Reply

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